to-do lists, calendars and annoyance

I want a really useful reminder/calendar service, and I am having a hard time finding one that does everything I want it to do. Here are the features I want:

*i want this online, password-protected so i can see it from anywhere, and other people can't
*open-ended to-do list function
*the option to set tasks as recurring "first friday of the month" in addition to "the 3rd of every month"
*calendar view, where days with events have some visible sign on them even when you're not looking at a detailed view
*security levels where i can make some tasks public, some private, and send some to other people's iCal feeds or Google calendars
*the ability to have it remind me via txt messaging
*the option to set deadlines and view overdue tasks
*event/task categorization and miscellaneous options

Any ideas?

I really like Remember the Milk, but it doesn't have a calendar view, and I can't set things to do "the first Friday of the month." For the calendar thing, it does interface with Google calendar, but only public lists and tasks do this, there's no way of keeping stuff private.

Tadalist is pretty nice, but doesn't have deadlines and notifications. It's really just for making lists.

Cozi is pretty nice, but you have to download it. The web version is ok, but the calendar view does not show any sign of what dates have events, so you have to check every week's detail view to get an idea of your future plans.

Todoist is nice, and the project-based organization system is cool... except most of my stuff isn't really project related. I mean, I could set up some stuff like that, but it just doesn't come as naturally to me. Maybe I just haven't tried this one with enough depth.

I dunno. What do you think? Do any of you use online services for lists, calendars, appointments, tasks, reminders? What's your favorite and why? Are there any I'm missing, or somehow haven't noticed functionality I'm looking for in?

need to borrow a nice digital camera for the weekend of October 5-7

I'll be presenting at Arse Elektronika next weekend, and I am wanting to get some good photos of the event. I am a film photographer, and this is the sort of thing that I think digital is better for. metaphorge has a digital camera, but it's a few years old and really needs to be replaced. Any of my friends have a shiny digital camera I could borrow for the weekend? SLR or point-and-shoot is ok so long as it does the regular stuff and can handle indoor lighting well. Long battery life and lots of storage a plus. Good camera good, but I don't think I want to borrow anything so nice I couldn't afford to replace if something happened to it.